Friday, April 8, 2011

Lost in Translation: I Kings 20 (Part 1)

People seem to have this perception of the Bible as either a book of fairy tales or a dry, boring chronology. Sometimes what gets in the way is the Old English of the KJV. When you read Old English--even if you know what all the words mean--you're forced to translate as you go. I love how poetic Scripture sounds in the KJV, but a lot can be lost in translation. For instance, the humor inherent in a story's dialogue or plot is often obscured by the unfamiliar style and vocabulary of Old English. Reading the same passage in an updated translation allows the average reader a better appreciation of the material. 


One of my favorite examples of humor in Scripture can be found in I Kings 20--a story filled with ridiculous characters, drunken dialogue and inane actions. To make it a little easier to read, I'm quoting from the NASB version. You can read in whatever version you like; the story will the same.
1 Now Ben-hadad king of Aram gathered all his army, and there were thirty-two kings with him, and horses and chariots And he went up and besieged Samaria and fought against it. Then he sent messengers to the city to Ahab king of Israel and said to him, "Thus says Ben-hadad, 'Your silver and your gold are mine; your most beautiful wives and children are also mine.'"
 Nothing really out of the ordinary here... Just one arrogant monarch asserting his dominance over a presumably less powerful peer. What should catch your attention is the message King Ahab sent in reply:
The king of Israel replied, "It is according to your word, my lord, O king; I am yours, and all that I have."
You tell him, Ahab! .... Wait, what? Did he really just agree? Yes, he did.And it gets better.
Then the messengers returned and said, "Thus says Ben-hadad, 'Surely, I sent to you saying, "You shall give me your silver and your gold and your wives and your children," but about this time tomorrow I will send my servants to you, and they will search your house and the houses of your servants; and whatever is desirable in your eyes, they will take in their hand and carry away.'"
After all, Ahab just conceded everything he owned. What did he expect? Of course Ben-hadad was interested in more than lip service. Why he march an entire army from Aram to Israel and back again without taking any sort of plunder?
Then the king of Israel called all the elders of the land and said, "Please observe and see how this man is looking for trouble; for he sent to me for my wives and my children and my silver and my gold, and I did not refuse him." All the elders and all the people said to him, "Do not listen or consent."
Well, duh!  Of course you shouldn't just hand everything over to Ben-hadad. Personally, I find it amazing that he even had to ask for advice on this one.
So he said to the messengers of Ben-hadad, "Tell my lord the king, 'All that you sent for to your servant at the first I will do, but this thing I cannot do.'" And the messengers departed and brought him word again. 10 Ben-hadad sent to him and said, "May the gods do so to me and more also, if the dust of Samaria will suffice for handfuls for all the people who follow me."
Cue the ridiculous smack talk. Translation: "When I get through with you, there won't be enough of Samaria left for each of my men to talk a hnldful of dust home."
11 Then the king of Israel replied, "Tell him, 'Let not him who girds on his armor boast like him who takes it off.'"
Translation: Don't boast like you've already won the battle when it hasn't even started yet. Get it? Because you gird on your armour before the battle, and you take it off after the battle... At least, that's the most sense I can make of Ahab's reply. If you wanna break it down further, I suppose you could say, "Don't count your chickens before they hatch."
12 When Ben-hadad heard this message, as he was drinking with the kings in the temporary shelters, he said to his servants, "Station yourselves." So they stationed themselves against the city.
Oh, that's it! You're going down Ahab! No more Mister Nice Guy... and so on and so forth. You know how it goes.
13 Now behold, a prophet approached Ahab king of Israel and said, "Thus says the LORD, 'Have you seen all this great multitude? Behold, I will deliver them into your hand today, and you shall know that I am the LORD.'" 
That part isn't humorous, but it did strike me as strange. If you're familiar with Ahab at all, you'll understand: Ahab is not the sort of guy you'd expect God to work miracles for.
14 Ahab said, "By whom?" So he said, "Thus says the LORD, 'By the young men of the rulers of the provinces.'" Then he said, "Who shall begin the battle?" And he answered, "You."
Look at Ahab, being all detail-oriented. Who're my best players? Are we on defense or offense?
15 Then he mustered the young men of the rulers of the provinces, and there were 232; and after them he mustered all the people, even all the sons of Israel, 7,000. 16 They went out at noon, while Ben-hadad was drinking himself drunk in the temporary shelters with the thirty-two kings who helped him.17  The young men of the rulers of the provinces went out first; and Ben-hadad sent out and they told him, saying, "Men have come out from Samaria." 
"While Ben-hadad was drinking himself drunk..." Right after declaring war... Umm... Ok. Apparently Ben-hadad didn't expect Israel to go on the offensive. Which is probably why God told Ahab that he should start the battle.
18 Then he said, "If they have come out for peace, take them alive; or if they have come out for war, take them alive."
Yep, definitely drunk. What kind of a statement is that? I have a wonderful mental image of a drunk, staggering Ben-hadad slurring his words together as he delivers this idiotic command.
19 So these went out from the city, the young men of the rulers of the provinces, and the army which followed them. 20 They killed each his man; and the Arameans fled and Israel pursued them, and Ben-hadad king of Aram escaped on a horse with horsemen. 21 The king of Israel went out and struck the horses and chariots, and killed the Arameans with a great slaughter.
I figure an army with drunk commanders is probably pretty easy pickings--comparatively, anyway.


When you're reading through the historical books of the Old Testament, it's easy to skip over the details without a second thought. Something I've found helpful is retelling the stories in your own words. Processing the information that way really helps the story stick in your memory.

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